I recently signed up for an online, zoom-style writing course.
I am attempting to learn more about how to write with purpose and structure.
This past session, which was an hour long, focused on letting go of an outcome or agenda. I did not really understand what that meant in its entirety when applying it to writing.
As students, we heard the topic from the moderator and then began writing, without stopping, for 10 minutes. The goal is to listen to our minds, keep the pen moving and not focusing on perfection. We were instructed to focus only on what our mind was saying. Then, she reads a second topic, and we repeat the process. Just keep moving the pen and listen.
So, that is what I did or so I thought.
After the first ten minutes, we took a minute or two to finish our thoughts and get ready for the second topic.
This time, the moderator repeated the first topic, word for word, and then said, “Go.”
I sat there for at LEAST 2 minutes. Did she forget she already read this topic? Do I type her error in the chat to let her know? There are over three hundred people on this Zoom, didn’t anyone else catch that? What the heck is going on?
And then…the AHA moment.
I already had it in my head, we were doing this session the same way we had done it before.
I was attached to the outcome.
I expected a second topic.
The moderator ignored the chat comments (from all the participants) and continued forward. After the second ten-minute writing session, the moderator told us she repeated the first topic on purpose.
She gave us a live experience of what it is like to be attached to an outcome. Man, That. Was. Good!
Looking back, I recalled several ways I had been “attached!” I thought for sure I would be married at least five years before I had a child. I was pregnant within six months of my wedding. I thought for sure I would work in the medical field my entire life. I changed careers at age 34 to law enforcement. I thought for sure I would work in law enforcement for at least 20 years. I retired after 13.5 years.
The change and flow of my life… has been like a wave. Some days the waters are rough, Some days my life looks like a calm and peaceful lake without anything stirring.
I am learning, although at a three-toed sloth of a pace, I am learning.
Being attached can lead to disappointment and anxiety. Letting go of what I think “should” be, is difficult (especially for an ex-cop).
May I say, though, how freeing it is to just… be.
Article by CopsAlive Contributor:
Sgt. Tammy Featherstone (Ret)
Founder of Frame of Reference Coaching LLC
CTA Certified Life Coach
Empowering all women through Coaching and Mentoring
to be their own fiercest ally!
Photo Credit: “Chain Link Fence” by You As A Machine is licensed under CC BY-SA 2.0 thru flickr
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